If Only I Had Known: Avoiding Common Mistakes In Couples Therapy

I think this book is great for beginning therapists, and not just for couples therapy. It is an easy read and easity to go straight to the chapter that maybe applies to a certain situation. The only reason I didn't love the book is each chapter defines the mistake and how to prevent it. It doesn't give a lot on how to correct it after the fact. I had an issue of an alliance starting and wanted to know some specific techniques I could maybe try out to stop it and it doesn't really provide that.

I am a counseling graduate student taking a couples counseling class and ran across this book while ordering my textbooks. It is a very good review of the the actual counseling process versus the theory books that I'm reading for class so it has been a great addition and review with a couples perspective. Glad to add it to my library. This book is also very easy to read in that it is not too psychologically esoteric - where I need to read the sentence over three times to understand what I've read or my mind wanders to what my cat is doing. Don't get me wrong, I am an avid reader of just about anything psychological but this book is one I really look forward to reading because it is so accessible.

I get that this book is primarily for beginners, but it was incredibly disappointing even still. As another reviewer has mentioned, the tone seems extremely negative toward couple therapy (which is surprisingly, considering that's the book's primary topic) and the authors make it seem as though this treatment unit is impossibly difficult to work with. As an MFT trained at an excellent program, I specialize in work with couples and individuals and feel very comfortable conducting therapy with them. Of course, working with couples isn't for everyone, but the authors make it seem like all therapists seriously struggle with this population. This is certainly not the case. Please do not let this book deter you from working with couples, especially if they are your preferred treatment unit! It's not as difficult or as complicated as the authors make it seem.To all of the beginning clinicians out there, know that working with couples can be one of the most rewarding experiences that you'll ever have. Relationships form the basis of society and if you work to help heal them, you are making an incredible contribution to the world. For a much better supplemental training/reading experience, I suggest reading books and articles from Epstein, Baucom, Gottman, Gordon, Johnson, etc. instead. They are the true masters!

This book is a great beginner's book to couple's therapy. It seems to scare the reader into believing that couple's therapy is incredibly difficult though, which could make a starter therapist shy away from couples work. Overall, I would recommend it for anyone starting to work with couples.

Haven't we all said, "Whew, I certainly did learn from that mistake!" or "I wish I was wise enough to learn from other's mistakes before I have to learn by error myself!"? This book offers you a way to prevent mistakes in couples therapy and provides solutions for working with tough situations in relationship counseling. Ah, it is so much easier to hear someone else talk about their learning experiences. And so refreshing to prevent them in your own practice! Great book!Gail Olson, PhD, LIMHP[...]

I actually enjoy reading this book! It is required reading for a class, so it has to be done, but it's actually good. It is easy to read and understand. Anyone in the counseling field should take a peek!

This book was required reading for a class taught by an EXCELLENT instructor, who had a lot of systems counseling experience. This book is blunt in a good way, practical, and relevant, although it could use some revisions in order to reflect more contemporary terminology. This is a book that will stay on my Counselor shelf in my office!

It is kind of annoying because the letters are kind of small but the information and the structure is really helpful.

Trotz der fehlerorientierten Herangehensweise (vgl. "avoiding common mistakes") ein sehr kluges Buch für alle, die gern auch die Erfahrungen von Kolleginnen für sich nutzen. Einfach lesen, eigene Patzer wiedererkennen, inspirieren lassen und immer wieder besser werden.