Madness: A Bipolar Life

I have never felt quite so mad as I did while reading this book. She drew me into the world of her mind like a magnet and I saw and felt what it’s like!I cracked up when her therapist had to tell her to go to a dentist with parking and she didn’t have to be perfect!I loved this book and will probably read it again.

This book was important to me in nursing a broken heart as I had dated a bipolar man for two years and eventually we broke up due to his abrupt and extreme mood changes and his substance usage. I know that bipolar is a difficult diagnosis to have but I didn't realize the full reality of what it meant until coming upon this book. My boyfriend used to get so angry at me for walking slow, driving slow (the speed limit), or not doing anything up to his speed. In the book, the author explains that when she was in manic phase, EVERYONE seemed slow and it was excruciating to her to tolerate her perceived "slowness" of others as the thoughts inside her head were moving in warp speed. When my boyfriend was in his depressed stage he would literally disappear, not answer the phone, not talk to me, and drink. The author explains how devastating the depressive cycle was to her and how impossible it was to get up out of bed during this time, in fact she would use cocaine to get her going. She explains the relationship of the manic depressives cycles to substance usage. At times I would try to talk to my boyfriend about his "cycles" which were predictable and he would stare at me and act like he didn't know what I was talking about, which I couldn't believe, since it seemed so obvious. But in this book, the author explains her surprise as an adult when a psychologist asked her about how fast she cycled (changed moods) and she didn't know what he was talking about. To her, the moods were random and came and went without explanation. In fact the psychologist had to explain to her what a "cycle" was. She was so unaware about herself.At the end of our relationship, my boyfriend found another woman in less than a month's time which truly hurt my feelings, and yet the author also reveals that after the breakup of her marriage she had found a new husband and moved across country in less than a month. Impulsivity, another aspect of bipolar manic phase.Reading this revealing autobiography helped me to understand what demons my ex boyfriend was wrestling with and helped to heal some of my hurts that I had taken his behaviors personally and realized it wasn't like that. This book will not save our relationship as me and my ex have both moved on, but I applaud the author for her candid writing about a mental state that affects many of the most creative and loving people. It will also help me know ahead of time what I might be getting into should I ever be attracted to a man with bipolar again, which I actually don't think will happen, unless he is willing to take medication to treat it, which my ex expressed he did not want to do. Still, I think this is a good book to help understand friends and loved ones. I recommend it.

I love Marya’s writing style. She’s very intelligent, witty and humorous. I’ve read this book too many times to count.

I eagerly purchased "Madness" after its release; "Wasted" was one of the most compelling memoirs I've ever read and Hornbacher is a fascinating and incredibly talented writer. After reading about a third of the book, I found myself struck by the disparity between Marya Hornbacher the writer and Marya Hornbacher the person.Marya the writer is thoughtful and shockingly insightful; she is hyper self-aware, almost to the point of being self-obsessed, able to write chapter after chapter of intricate prose about her own history, thoughts, and actions.Marya the person seems to lack any self-awareness. She acts on impulse alone, jumping from one whim to the next, rarely stopping to pause and think about what she's doing. She is sucked into her own emotions and compulsions easily; she easily slips back into patterns drug & alcohol habits, compulsive spending, self-mutilation, sex-addicted behavior.Both Maryas are interesting, and make for a hardy memoir, but there's something missing in the writing. "Madness" is extremely detached, written as if "Marya" is a fictional character being written about by an impartial observer. It's often hard to believe that Marya the writer actually did the things Marya the person did. There's plenty of pretty prose, plenty of insight, but there's no connectivity. Hornbacher is a great writer, but she is a clinical and analytical one. Sometimes that works in a memoirist's favor (see, "Darkness Visible," "Girl Interrupted") but it's just sort of strange to read someone writing about themselves in a cold, mathematical, detached sort of what when they are trying to relate periods of extreme passion & mental illness. She'll write about an epic mental breakdown or temper tantrum, but there is no fervor in the narrative that pulls you into the writer's mind & into the moment with her. I mean, say what you will about Elizabeth Wurtzel (another person who has published multiple books concerning herself & her struggles with mental illness), but she has a deeply idiosyncratic and conversational writing style that makes it very easy to imagine her acting in the temperamental, selfish, impossible, moody ways she describes. Marya Hornbacher seems like two different people in her books. It worked well in "Wasted," in which she discussed her detachment from her body and her emotions, but it just falls a little flat in "Madness." She is describing CAPSLOCK EMOTIONS, but they don't feel CAPSLOCK to the reader."Madness" also could have used some heavy-duty editing; the book's organization is difficult and, well, a little disorganized. And she does have a habit of presenting the same ideas and revelations with different wording over & over again. A lot could have been cut, which would have made "Madness" a more impactful read. I found it hard to get through at times. You know what they say about brevity being the soul of wit? Yeah, it's true.None of this is to imply that "Madness" is a bad book. Far from. It's just a bit of a difficult and frustrating read at times. When it is good, it is really really good. And even when it's bad, it's not horrid.

Excellent book so so well written . I sincerely want every one to read this extraordinary book if it’s the last book they read on bipolar. Useful read for carers too. For all those who are reluctant to stick to a treatment plan or fear that the side effects of their meds are too many , this genius author , Marya’s personal, authentic experiences and her sheer heroism after taking heavy dose of medication and then to push against gobsmacking mood swings to write her inner workings in mind-blowing detail is stunning!!!! Stupendous, once in a lifetime read.

Ich habe schon Wasted gelesen und war daher ein bisschen enttäuscht von diesem Buch, da etwa die Hälfte des Buches einfach nur eine Wiederholung des Vorgängers war... Eigentlich schade. aber dennoch ein gutes Buch.Im Gegensatz zum 1. Band, wesentlich weniger triggernd für mich.

I was interested in this as I have been diagnosed as having the same illness. I must admit that the beginning of the book had me feeling anxious and I even had a nightmare about it. This could be due to the incredible way in which mania is described and you go along bouncing off the walls. Of course there is the down side. That is what I have been going through lately but not as wildly as the author. I think anyone who has someone in their lives with this illness, should read this book. From my own experience, I know that someone who has never suffered the 'invisible disease' just cannot understand.

最初の数ページしか読めませんでした。Ｗａｓｔｅｄの翻訳版がよかったので購入しましたが驚きの連続でした。内容はいいと思うので邦訳を待ちます。

Since my father and sister are bipolar, I like to read mental illness books in order to understand their travails. Marya Hornbacher's bipolar illness is so much worse, and she does an amazing job of portraying the ins and outs of manic depression. Must read.