My War Gone By, I Miss It So

The war in Bosnia is complicated, with its multiple combatant entities, ethnic conflict among people who did not believe strongly in their ethnicity or religion, and a coalition of competing leaders that waged war for the conflicting goals of personal profit, ethnic superiority, religious domination, or multiculturalism. Therefore, I found it extremely difficult to get through research based works on the Bosnian War. That is why Anthony Loyd's book came as a breath of fresh air.Loyd came to Bosnia as an action-craving expatriate Brit, bored of his stable life and in search of a break from the mundane. Though he was only searching for cheap thrills, he threw himself completely into becoming a "war tourist," as is highlighted by his hilarious, yet ingenious means of learning the Bosnian language ("I called up the nearest Serbo-Croatian restaurant and asked them if they had anyone that could teach me Serbo-Croatian").He subsequently describes how he went into Bosnia in the same way that other young people backpack through Europe. And from this comes remarkable stories that range from those of the ordinary families of Sarajevo trying to preserve some sense of normalcy while under siege to those of creative and flamboyant mid-level commanders of Croatian and Bosnian units as they engineer successful and unsuccessful attacks. The book, however, is at its best describing how a generation of youthful individuals like himself were transformed into soldiers and unwillingly grouped into sides by cunning and manipulative leaders. One of my favorite parts, for example, was Loyd's description of the fighters of the Croat HOS militia who fought the Serbs at the frontline by day and partied in happening bars by night.Loyd’s on hand description is not necessarily a scholarly text, but it does highlight various absurdities of the war and the ethnic cleansing that it came with it. These include his outstanding description of local Croat soldiers bringing their Muslim neighbors and friends to the protection of the UN to prevent their comrades from murdering them and the drunken reunion of rival Serb and Muslim commanders on the battlefield, boyhood friends pitted against each other by the war. These scenes, and others, give a certain character to the war and its combatants that will not be found in any scholarly work.To be sure, Loyd’s writing does heavily favor the Bosnian government, as he himself states. Nevertheless, no bias against Serbs or Croats (their ethnicities) is present and particularly interesting was his description of how thousands of Serbs and Croats fought for the supposedly Muslim government.What stands out about Loyd is his genuine ability to draw the reader into the book and make his story come to life in the sense that the reader feels like they’re right there with him as he documents the war from the front lines, Sarajevo, tiny country villages, and dangerous back roads leading to and from the front. For the reader, this book allows the Bosnian War to be lived and understood long after the fighting ended.

Powerful, relate-able, readable. I particularly like this passage:'Listen,' he said 'you can do this only so long through ignorance. Reality comes to everybody is they stay long enough. So now maybe you have seen it, don't waste your time dwelling it. Learn that every day will be different; some days you can be "brave", and some days you cannot. Don't punish yourself with it, it's OK. It's normal. Cut down on your emotional output. You can carry on indefinitely if you stop thinking so much. There is so much s*** talked here. Don't argue about anything unnecessarily. Don't get worked up, angry, sad, don't even talk about anything that doesn't matter. Conserve your energy. Whatever you know, you know s***. Each of us has the reaction. It is about different chemistry on different days. Each day is different for each person. You must understand that.

This is a great book. I'll be honest I didn't know a whole lot about that conflict or it's scope. Anthony Loyd does a great job telling the story without (in most cases) taking sides. His self loathing gets a little tiring and frankly I couldn't care less about his relationship with his father. However, I found the people he met and their stories compelling. Anthony Loyd's description of the suffering and the horrible details of the casualties and the the dead bring his experiences to life for the reader. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who is interested in learning what a war correspondent goes through or the stories of the victims of this modern conflict.

War books tend to romanticize war - they give war a cause and a strategy - a purpose. My War Gone By, I Miss It So gives you none of that - it is war stripped of its meaning and presented as a destructive release of man's worst tendencies.Maybe the different perspective is due to the difference in subject. War books tend to glamorize generals or heroes. Loyd is neither - he a photo journalist. The fight isn't his, but he choices to imbue himself in it. He travels to disintegrating Yugoslavia with the intent to more than merely cover the war; he wants to experience war and to participate in this own way. He finds other foreigners drawn not to the cause, but to the fight. Without a purpose heroics have a different meaning, it isn't about winning but how you deal with your circumstances like the injured officer who shoots himself so that his men won't risk their lives to rescue him.The war was pointless: the opponents were had more in common than different - Loyd tells stories about neighbors on separate sides catching up during cease fires. When the cease fire ends, the killing resumes - as nasty and as brutal as before.Other war books talk in terms of policies and campaigns. Loyd deals with the fighters from their perspective it is pretty obvious that everyone would have been better off without the war. Why did people fight it? Loyd concludes that there is something lacking in modern life that can only be found in combat.I don't think the world has to be so nasty and brutish. The hard part is finding your way out - violence is self perpetuating. It is hard to remember the consequences when you give up on productive solutions and choice destruction over creation.

This book is a shocking insight into human degradation. One of the few books that I have read in my life that "I couldn't put down". It's an account of Anthony Lloyd's experience as a journalist in Bosnia and Chechnya interspersed with accounts of his heroin addiction and his riven family. It is shocking in its honest but voyeuristic account of the escalation and depravation of war. He wrestles with the emotions of viewing as an outsider and being a participant in a world that very few of us will understand. I hope this has been cathartic for Mr Lloyd but I fear that it probably hasn't. I guess there are just too many demons.

This was an extremely well written tragic account of the war in Bosnia. In parallel with the author's story of the war, he also details his own personal difficulties, including a heroin addiction. The inhumanity and pointlessness of this war were at times difficult to read and comprehend. Those who had lived together for years turning against each other is frightening. Lloyd does not attempt to cover up the worst aspects of the war, so readers should be prepared for some difficult reading. While those of us who are fortunate enough never to have been in a war zone will (thankfully) never know the true horror of war, it is important that we try to understand. This book provides a glimpse into the abyss of war and attempts to provide some information about the context of this particular situation. I recommend this book highly.

This book is a great read. It’s noNonsense writing style ensures you appreciate the true and horrifying experience of being on the frontlines in war torn Bosnia and the affects on innocent people whose only crime is their religious beliefs.

An amazing book. I read it after reading High Risk by Ben Timberlake who I reckon was influenced by the way Anthony Lloyd writes. I have always been frustrated and furious at the UN's handling of the Balkan wars and this book takes you there. You share the horror and frustration and despair at the depths if depravity and evil human beings can sink to. The author misses the war I shall miss this book

This book is a masterpiece if you love books on war.....The authors wordplay and style are outstanding you have to read this book...unfortunately its impossible to ever write book like this today as its not possible to travel anywhere you wish to report on a war freelance like they they did back in the day... we miss so much now......