The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life - 3 Volume Set (Summa Domestica, 1-3)

The Summa Domestica may sound like a pretty presumptuous title... the awe inspired by St. Thomas's magnum opus is such that I'm not sure any other author has ever dared match its title. But Leila Lawler did, and her choice speaks both of the spirit of her book and of the refreshing boldness with which she pours out all of her convictions. Everyone familiar with her blog Like Mother Like Daughter will know what I'm talking about! I've been reading it seemingly forever, and like everyone else was very excited when the book became a reality.Why buy the book when there is the blog? For one thing, it's good to be offline :-) But then what makes the blog charming, an experience very much like visiting with your best friend who happens to live next door - one never really knows what the two of you will end up talking about, everything under the sun is fair game, from the teensiest of practical details to philosophical musings - also means that there is an enormous amount of knowledge and information that is not easy to neatly categorize and access and digest. How do you file a chat with your friend over a cup of tea? Impossible! Even tags help only up to a point. But the book gave Auntie Leila the occasion to take the bird's eye view and find the common thread, the unifying principle of it all, and to systematize the bits of wisdom of so many years of blogging. The Summa Domestica shows us why it's good to be home, and then takes us by the hand to show how it can be done, so that we're not overwhelmed, we don't get discouraged, we find answers to a vast amount of questions.This is a warm book, witty, funny, wise, real (who can forget a weekly feature we all enjoyed in the blog, Pretty, Happy, Funny, Real? That was such a gift to us all, connecting our lives by reminding us to look for beauty, to celebrate happiness, to laugh at ourselves as we acknowledge that life can be messy at home and we all make mistakes!) Even though it's truly a Summa and can appear an intimidating read, as soon as you dive in you will be captivated and you won't be able to stop. My advice is to follow Leila's own advice, and read the beginning of Volume I first, so you get the fundamental reasons behind taking the step of staying at home and living out the truly universal feminine vocation. Don't worry: if you are a woman with a job outside the house you will not find anyone pointing the finger at you! You may not be able to live the ideal, or you may be called to live your vocation in a different setting, but it's good to be open to reading these initial chapters, which also tell the interesting story of Leila's own awakening, a story I'm not sure she's ever fully told on the blog.But then, feel free to skip all over, whatever you are in the mood for, or delve into the chapters that tackle your own present challenges, whatever they may be: a newborn who has trouble nursing, unruly toddlers, menu planning, understanding what it really means to manage your household in a sensible way, how to find creative outlets, or how to teach reading to your kiddos. This is a happy book, a book about possibilities. Because it comes from the blog, each chapter is just a few pages long, though themes can span over a number of chapters. This means you'll get just the right amount of food for thought each time.Will you agree with everything Leila writes? No! My guess is that even Leila may change her mind on some topics, not the big issues, but the practical side of things, and soon we'll see her on the blog writing "What I Wish I Had Said About XYZ in my Book", and we'll all be visiting again, exchanging opinions in the comment section (where she regularly replies - anyone can become a friend of Auntie Leila!) Sometimes you'll be convinced and do things Leila's way, sometimes she'll help you figure out your own way.So don't be afraid to disagree and don't get all ruffled - she'd like nothing better than a frank exchange of opinions, just head over to the blog! But be open to her advice and don't discount it: it's so full of common sense, and you can trust that it all comes from real life lived by a real family. Don't you ever get the impression that a lot of books on parenting are written on the strength of book-learning, but have not been tested by the authors in real life? Not this one! This is not a book where The Expert sits you down for a lecture: it's hard-earned wisdom acquired through trial and error and a lot of thinking, in the absence of what Leila aptly calls the "collective memory" that helped previous generations of women understand and manage their role at home. It takes courage to do something like that. You will see Leila admitting to mistakes (like not understanding that iced tea may not be the best drink when nursing!), admitting she knew very little when she started her married life. "If I can do it, so can you!" is one of her slogans - this is why I said it's a book about possibilities, where you don't even need to worry about them costing money because Leila is all about thrifting! She even reflects on how to deal with regrets, which are inevitable - truly, this is a book that will bring peace of mind where before there was frustration.There is a ribbon in each volume, though in truth you'd need a million of them - but it's such a nice touch! Nothing says the publisher truly had readers in mind more than a ribbon thoughtfully sewn in a book. The font is also very pleasant to read, and all volumes are graced by the sweet drawings of one of the author's daughters. It comes with a sturdy case - it feels very much like the covers of the books themselves. All this is to say, you won't regret giving this as a gift to a bride, to a new mom or to a seasoned one who feels she's lost her touch, or to any young woman who's musing about her future.

Boy, am I glad I bought these on a whim. A pure treasure, full of whimsical, hilarious, serious, downright adult conversations about you, and home, and husband, and children.What a wonder, to me. Wish they were available to me when I first got married.Fair warning, however, you might be ordering cloth napkins before you finish the first book.You will love it. Especially that chapter about spanking naughty kids. 😂

I’ve followed Auntie Leila for years as a blog reader and have gone back to many of her posts multiple times for advice and inspiration. I was happy to purchase the book as “payback” for all the years of free advice she’s parsed out to her readers. But, I was surprised how touching it was to see the “collective memory” in print. If you’re new to Leila or on the fence about this purchase, I strongly encourage you to buy it. There’s almost infinite information available online about meal planning, breastfeeding, reading lists, etc. The trouble is, much of it is garbage and a good deal of it is coming from moms in the first stage of their parenting journey. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the solidarity, but what I really need is advice from experienced parents who have piloted the advice and lived the results. Leila has the experience and wisdom (which aren’t always mutually exclusive) to speak to a new generation of moms and homemakers.

I staunchly disagree with her Catholic theology however no Reformed Protestant has written such a book on practical motherly advise.Her understanding of gender roles and caring for her family as the primary responsibility in this we do agree.Her practical and not theoretical pontifications are gold.

I have only just started reading The Summa Domestica, and at about my fifth page (reading in an interspersed manner among the pages), I thought, "Leila is one of my favorite people." This book is laden with wisdom of the kind from the long past that has the weight of moon rock--more dense per unit than regular rocks. For years I have read her blog, and over and over again, it has saved my domestic life in so many ways. I regularly apply her tips and ways of doing things. But that is not all--it is not just the precipitous practical elements that help so much, but rather, it is also the larger categories of conception that liberate from any fog due to being so much in the midst of it all that you can't get a grip.Leila is one of my dear, dear favorite people, even though we've never met! I truly thank God for her and that she wrote a timeless, beautifully-designed and crafted trilogy that sits with real weight on my shelf, in my hands, and on the table. I don't even let my children caress the covers unless their hands are clean. And the covers are so smooth and soft that little children will want to touch them, and hopefully wonder what special things are inside that their mama appreciates so much. And, yes, they hear me laugh sometimes when I read it because Leila is so absolutely funny, too.

My wife asked me three times why I bought this for her. Ended up returning it.

I found the Summa Domestica through the Sofia Press Institute from which we receive some periodicals. I came to know Auntie Leila’s blogs that way and read a fair bit on there before I got the books. The three volumes are about family/home culture, home education, and home-making and housekeeping. The books are larger than I thought and took me a couple of months to read, but because the chapters are based on blog posts (which are thoroughly edited), they are usually very short and easily digestible. The idea is that you learn the art of homemaking bit by bit, as it would be a great challenge to try and implement it all at once.Oh, how I loved these beautiful, eloquently written, encouraging and humorous books (and the blog, which is free to read; but I found that the books are helpful as a starting point because they are very well organised according to topic. They are well indexed, too). Now I have mad respect for Auntie Leila and find her and her knowledge somewhat intimidating even, but foremost her content is incredibly helpful. I highly recommend to any wife or mother, especially in the early stages, and if you do not have that Catholic Auntie who raised seven children (and has got at least 16 grandchildren) in real life.Some parts are very American, which is of course understandable and expected given that Auntie Leila’s family in based in the USA, but this was not really something that stood in the way for me a fellow European. In my eyes, Catholic culture and identity always transcend nationality, and the well-read Laila Marie Lawler wrote everything in such a way, with a broad scope, that it could be universally applied to most typical families with children (how skilfully done!).I will be dipping back to the books in the future frequently, I am sure, but I think that my biggest lessons were the following: I must ‘waste’ time with my little ones, homemaking is a whole world and art in itself and can be immensely enjoyable and fulfilling on the whole, even the ugly parts such as sickness and teaching good behaviour (correcting undesired behaviour), if I only surrender and accept that THIS is my vocation. All of the seemingly pointless and wasteful tasks all relate to a bigger picture. This is it – but there are many a height to rise to!I have read plenty of homemaking and parenting books, and blogs, and I must say, many of them can be more harmful than helpful. Certainly, advice needs to be age-specific, even advice to the mother, it must be tailored around the ages, and possibly the number, of her children. Auntie Leila possesses exactly that nuance and also just general thoughtfulness and kindness. The wisdom in the Summa proves Auntie Leila to be trustworthy (I do not say this lightly). In regard to home life, I don’t think I’ll ever have to look much further than our classic Summa Domestica.

I highly recommend these books for any lady wanting to get her home life organised. Totally practical with a strong Christian viewpoint. I have been recommending this set of books to numerous friends.