Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny

Important discussion. Recommend for anyone interested in gender

Great

Kate Manne brings theoretical and analytical thinking to a field that desperately needs it, with a style that is accessible to all. She is an incredible philosopher, scholar and writer. (She is also a powerful thought leader on Twitter, and her ongoing dialogue there continuously enriches the content of — and my connection with — her work)

Very good book.

This is an exceptionally well thought out, developed and persuasively defended book on misogyny and its devastating effects on women's lives. The author is a philosopher but the book is, for the most part, written in such a way that a person with little background in philosophy can easily read and understand its basic premises and conclusions. It is dense, to be sure, and contains hundreds of footnotes (all of which should be read in their entirety), but seriously worth it. The most interesting aspect of the book, to me, was that she removes misogyny from the realm of the psychological (which conceptualizes misogyny as the hatred that individual "bad apple" man have for women) and places it firmly in the realm of the political. Her definition of misogyny as the policing arm of sexism (defined as the attitudes people hold on the differences between the genders, which they often view as innate and unchangeable) and of patriarchy is convincing, well argued, intellectually satisfying and rings true. Her analysis of misogyny as the rage and shame that men feel when their entitlement to female attention, caring and giving is perceived to have been withheld is eye opening. The most interesting aspect of the book, for me, is her analysis of how we women are largely complicit in the misogyny that prevails in our culture. We "himpathize" with the man even when he has clearly wronged a woman. We suspect the rape victim of being a slut or a liar and prefer that the golden boy in an elite college who has perpetrated this crime not to go to prison and ruin his poor young life; what happens to the girl becomes largely irrelevant. We tend to find the testimony of a man more believable than that of a woman. We excuse statements denigrating women as locker room talk or just joking. We stand by silently when we are humiliated, and we stand by when other women are humiliated. We view ambitious women as cold, shrill, demanding and bitchy when competing against a man, whereas we view ambitious men as strong and focused. This finally explained to me why some of my female friends accepted the mainstream media's views of Hilary Clinton as untrustworthy and unfit for higher office. I sympathize when, towards the end of the book, the author arrives at a point where she seems to say, oh what's the point, all this will probably never change, given the deeply ingrained complicity of women in their own subjugation and denigration. I often find myself feeling the same way but I would ask her: What's the alternative? Giving up? Yes, we are looking at a Mt. Everest of opposition but we have made much progress and will continue to make progress. An encouraging factoid of which I was unaware is that the negative emotions that women feel towards a woman running for the highest office are not directed towards a woman running, say, for the Senate. So there is hope here. Let's elect as many woman to as many public offices as we can and get rid some of the pernicious misogynist policies that cripple women's lives. On a personal note, although I am a fairly assertive and outspoken person, this book has made me even more resolved never to stand by and allow myself to be denigrated again, unless it's literally a dangerous and life threatening situation where caution is probably the better part of valor. It is the same resolve I have long ago arrived at with respect to racism when it happens in my presence. Bad things happen when good women remain silent. And I have found a line for myself that I will have handy when misogyny happens to me. " You want to bully me? I'm not going to be bullied by you. Back off." I no longer permit mansplaining ("nah, don't need you to explain, I'm good"), and, as a person who flies a lot, manspreading ("can you put your legs into your own space instead of mine") ) (man become almost literally apoplectic when you do that), or any of the insidious forms of misogyny we all put up with every day. It won't change the world but it changes my world. Up Girl!